weird dreams last night, involving a forest... and an older man with a wig, like 45 years old or so, that was on vacation, married, but i thought i had feelings for him, but when he left to go back to his wife, i had realized that it was an aquaintance that i sparred with occasionally, the Knight of the Mountain King, that I had been in love with all the time. So, one night, when the gracious Knight (who for some reason was wearing something like a court jester's outfit mixed with the pope's?!?) was making us dinner, which was some weird concoction of fried nuts, berries, and gummy bears, i kissed him. then we began planning our wedding, months later. he was the same cynical, depressive man that i had fallen in love with, but he was MINE.
so. i'm trying to become motivated to do things around the house today. i dunno if i want to deal with people. at least, the intense feeling of overwhelming panic that i had last night is gone, leaving a weird... emptiness, i guess.
i need caffeine. *runs off to make some earl grey tea*