April 22nd, 2004

disco star

a year... a YEAR?!?!?

one year ago today, at approximately 6 pm PST, i rolled into Vancouver with all of my worldly belongings either stuffed in, or strapped to the top of my jeep.

i've been here one year as of today.

wow.

my life in phoenix seems so far away, to almost seem as if it had happened to another person, or in another lifetime. much has changed, some has stayed the same.

i get nostalgic about a lot of things, namely listening to old songs that The Vacant Stairs did, hearing songs that were played at Good Time Charlies frequently in karaoke, seeing pictures of a sunset in the desert. i miss the friends i left behind, especially since i know i've been the worst at keeping in contact. i miss the spring and summer nights, sitting outside and feeling the warm wind, hearing it hiss through the palm trees. i miss the monsoons. i miss the complete independance of living on my own, driving where i wanted to when i wanted to, and surviving completely off my own means.

in contrast, i now have found joy in having a roommate, when i thought i could never stand to live with another person. i have played completely by myself on stage in front of many people, had them dancing along with my music and applauding for ME. i remembered how much more fun working in retail can be, since it is a job that is away from the office politics and backstabbing that you get in most desk jobs. i have become closer to my family, learning much more about my past, my mother's past, and my brother's future. i don't even LOOK anything like i did when i moved here.

looking back over things, i was depressed in phoenix. i felt trapped and didn't know how to even begin to change things. although i'm making about a third of what i did there, i live more comfortably. i think that not having to come home to an empty apartment night after night helps tremendously.

sure, there are more things that i would like to improve on and change over the next 12 months. but at least i now know to not fear the future. take what comes and deal with it.

it always works out in the end.
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    ER... mmmmm Dr. Kovac! *slurp*
disco star

(no subject)

maybe being blonde isn't a good thing, at least for what it does to my hair.

i took a bubble bath last night. i came back later after the water had drained...

...


... and it looked like a large blonde gorilla shaved itself in our upstairs bathtub.

i've been paranoid about bald spots all day, and even thought i found one, but it turned out to be a cowlick.

it's fun (and different) for me to be blonde, but maybe i'll grow my hair out a teensy bit and go annoyingly bright blazing RED. just cuz i can. and dying my hair once red would be SO much better to it than bleaching... sometimes bleaching again... and then toning... and you do get those amazing little tubes of yummy conditioner in there, too.

we'll see.

i'm not dating anyone (actually, if i ever made an annoucement that i WAS, i think several people would fall dead instantly, immediatly after turning to each other and quixotically saying 'i thought she was GAAAAAY?!?!?' *death*), so i don't really have to worry about looking attractive to the opposite sex (especially since i'm not even remotely INTERESTED in anyone atm), but even so, i would prefer to not spend my single life BALD. or baldING. thanks.

i'm rereading (as i'm reading the world of time series, currently on book nine, kaythanks) the Death Gate Cycle by margaret weis and tracy hickman. i forgot how FUN this series was. back when i was a teen, this was my absolute favorite book series OF ALL TIME. haplo was my favorite character, i was SO in love with him. love love love.

i'm just sad that the only book in the series i currently have here is Serpent Mage. all the others are still in phoenix. *pout*

anyone else ever read this series? i remember finishing that one, being amazed and happy and ecstatic with it, and trying to get the same joy out of other weis/hickman stories, but none that i read began to touch on it.