April 25th, 2008

dreams

(no subject)

This man was the center point for my main dream last night:



I had such a giant, adoring crush on the man. I moved through day to day, hoping that he would notice me. My self esteem was such that I knew that love would never happen, but I was beyond content with him even just knowing that I exist, CARING that I exist. I sat on the floor in someone's living room, and he sat next to me, making some quip. My heart soared with quiet happiness. Where we were sitting (wedged between the ottoman and something else), we were wedged in close together as I sat with a blanket wrapped around my waist. After that "day" in the dream, however, I would pass him far across the parking lot of the apartment complex or turn a corner right before he would have moved into sight behind me. We were constantly put into situations where he never saw me again, though I would come across him in the distance.

(Emotions from this dream gives me a nice lump in the throat.)

Later, The Mercury Tree was playing some venue with some old metal acts. Overkill (remember them, anyone? "Hello From the Gutter"?) opened, and Yngwie Malmsteen followed. Dio went on before us. I was nervous about the reception from the crowd, but gaeba assured me it would all be alright. She was quite the emotional anchor for me ;) She did freak out, though, when Kevin Griffin from Better Than Ezra ran off with her jacket on accident. I chased him down and gave him a greeting card and a piece of cake. He showed me his 24 ankle bracelets and sheepishly gave me back Sam's jacket.

I'm not even worthy of your kiss
Just you knowing I'm alive would be fine
Cuz insecurity's a very good friend of mine...
disco star

(no subject)

Okay, so I don't have keys yet. Apparently, by law, they have to post the position as open online for five days and THEN give it to me, even though it is 100%ly mine. The sad thing is, they haven't gotten their arses around to posting it yet, and my first day by myself is on Wednesday... five days from now.

Did some awesome brainstorming with the boss today, he feels that I will be able to totally be The Win in this position. My confidence is growing. He and I went to lunch at Quiznos and hashed over the worries that I have and ideas that I can bring to the table.

The emotions from the dream I posted earlier weighed on my shoulders throughout the day. Bleh.

Another few days where I feel like every waking moment is spent at work. I just walked in the door and I'm off to bed so I can get a good solid sleep in before going to work at 4 am.

Bacci will not stop knocking stuff off my desk.

Who WOULDN'T want to play a game with an intro like this?