when i was waiting for my bus on the way to work yesterday, a woman sat next to me. she began griping about the bus being late. i stated that i was already late to work, and it was only my second day. she said something else, i said that i needed more coffee. the conversation then went like this:
Woman: i had some coffee this morning. then i just started.. COUGHING... and it was this deep cough, and once THAT started, i knew what was coming up next, so i ran to the bathroom, and sure enough, i threw up all of the coffee i had drank, and there was so much.. phlegm in it as well. i should know better than to drink coffee on an empty stomach, and there was so much snot and phlegm!...
Aubrey: well, THAT isn't good...
Woman: *goes off about phlegmy vomit and stuff as Aubrey starts looking around for the hidden cameras* and my COOCHIE hurts!
Aubrey: *scared* oh?
Woman: YES! it's just sad, cuz whenever i walk around, it hurts, when i sit down, it hurts...
*bus pulls up*
on the way HOME, two couples got on the bus, both about 20 years old, and one with two small children, the other with one little boy about 5 years old. i'm trying to watch them w/o looking like i'm outright staring....
Little Boy *turning to woman with two kids*: I'm a BOY TOY!
Woman starts laughing.
Little Boy's Father: yeah, he wants so badly to bed my older sister! ha ha! he keeps flirting with her and asking her to do it!!
*blink* yeeeah. that kids gonna be fun once he actually HITS puberty.
those conversations were just as much fun as one that my friend lori and i overheard in wendy's one day:
Mother: you know who your uncle will be once he gets married!?
Little Boy: MY DADDY!
Mother: *proudly* that's RIGHT!