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waking up inside a river and sweat and....

i woke up this morning, drowning in eye makeup and snot, and reeking of bar smoke.

i came home from work, my brother said it's dollar night at Boxxes, which is a gay club. he begs and pleads that since i don't have to work today, to go out. so finally, andrea and i agree. out of boredom, we dress up like "witches", her in a velvet tank top, skirt, purple and black striped pantyhose, and GIGANTIC heels, me in an EXTREMELY low cut velvet lacey number with flowing sleeves, long black skirt, dr. martens...

so jess, andrea, scott (jess's roommate), miranda and meself all head to portland, after downing a few beers at the speed of light (all cept miranda, cuz she's driving). i danced and danced and danced... egads, i haven't been dancing since WAY long before i left phoenix! i get to meet my brother's newest love interest, daniel (a total nerd, i loved him.)

we then walked up to Silverado, which is a gay strip club. i go to the bathroom and have this weird bonding moment with a gigantically buff gay firefighter (he randomly offered to protect my door so no one would walk in, then said i could repay him by helping to vote Bush out of the office, we talked, we hugged, we pissed a lot of people off that were waiting for the toilet...), whom i never saw again after leaving the bathroom.

watched andrea's reaction to male strippers, since she's never seen one before. eGADS, she was uncontrollable! instantly, her hand flies into her purse and she starts frantically searching for dollar bills with a panicked look on her face.... it was hilarious. i had found scott's $80 on the floor that he had dropped, so he gave me a dollar to play with... my brother told me to stuff it in my cleavage and point to it... after he took it, i giggled and pointed at my boobs and screamed "OH MAH GAW, I HAVE STRIPPER SPIT ON MY BOOOBS!"

and that's when i notice the Indian guy trying to hold andrea's hand. in our drunkenness, we kissed to get a reaction... she left, he started talking to me.... now. for those that don't know me or have never come out with me, i almost never play the goofy flirty girl. so, naturally, i was standing there, trying to have an intelligent conversation with the guy. he says "wow, that was HOT..... you know... i always wanted to see something like that.... i would even.. be willing to PAY... for something like that.... say.... a hundred dollars?" i laugh at him, my brother rescues me, and he follows me around for the remainder of the evening, saying "i'm SERIOUS."

so we came home, got Jack in the Box, i went to bed at almost 4 am, and woke up at 730.

something tells me i'll be going back to bed soon.

egads, i haven't been out and drinking at an actual bar in FOREVER. amazing how life changes.

i thought i had something to add here. maybe i'll remember.

Comments

( 17 comments — Leave a comment )
jenniffer
Oct. 22nd, 2004 03:55 pm (UTC)
Awwwwwwww..........I never have fun like that anymore. *sigh*
aubkabob
Oct. 22nd, 2004 04:17 pm (UTC)
come visit!

actually, we rarely do anything like that lol! we went out on a whim last night, after much kicking and fighting to even GET us out ;)
holdyerfire
Oct. 22nd, 2004 04:08 pm (UTC)
Aw, awesome!! Sounds like the sort of debauchary we have!

Man...you'd be fun as hell to hang out with!
aubkabob
Oct. 22nd, 2004 04:21 pm (UTC)
hee hee i was SO thinking of you guys as i was creating this post! :D
madmadhatter
Oct. 22nd, 2004 05:49 pm (UTC)
hee! you're awesome!
aubkabob
Oct. 23rd, 2004 02:26 am (UTC)
well. yanno... *gigantic blush*
madmadhatter
Oct. 24th, 2004 04:27 am (UTC)
aww!
ooxeno_staroo
Oct. 22nd, 2004 06:25 pm (UTC)
i wish i could go with you :)
aubkabob
Oct. 23rd, 2004 02:27 am (UTC)
maybe some day :)
griffxx
Oct. 22nd, 2004 07:58 pm (UTC)
"OH MAH GAW, I HAVE STRIPPER SPIT ON MY BOOOBS!"

Man, if I had a nickel for every time I yelled that.
talkingpotato
Oct. 22nd, 2004 08:25 pm (UTC)
HAHAHAH
Same here.. :-P
aubkabob
Oct. 23rd, 2004 02:28 am (UTC)
hee hee. i don't know which would be worse... nekkid strippers or floor strippers.

hoowee! gimme a plumber!
(Deleted comment)
aubkabob
Oct. 23rd, 2004 02:28 am (UTC)
yup :D one of the really wonderful things about going to gay bars is that i'm convinced that i radiate straightness - so i never get molested and i can go and have a fun time w/o having the hassle.
wickedcricket
Oct. 23rd, 2004 06:17 am (UTC)
Hooray for dressing like witches and going to gay strip clubs! And to think my own evening consisted of eating pumpkin bread and drinking Diet Coke while watching shows like "Bridezillas" and "The Real World" on Tivo! (Tivo allows me the luxury of indulging in embarrassing shows because I don't have to actually schedule a time to watch them.) God I'm boring!
aubkabob
Oct. 25th, 2004 04:36 pm (UTC)
hey, that sounds like the perfect evening, to me! :D i'm usually one for staying at home and dinking around anyway!
(Deleted comment)
aubkabob
Oct. 25th, 2004 04:37 pm (UTC)
that's part of why i do it ;)

course, the fact i had half of a brewery in my liver at that point had something to do with it, too...
(Deleted comment)
aubkabob
May. 25th, 2005 06:23 pm (UTC)
it's funny because occasionally at parties, a few straight boys WILL start kissing EEEEVERYBODY. i usually respond by pointing and giggling with my hand over my mouth like a polite little asian girl.
( 17 comments — Leave a comment )

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