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the older i get, the more i believe that i'm romantically dead. the closest thing to action that i've gotten in the last however long is a woman customer slipping me her number, a 70 year old guy asking me to lunch today, and a drunken misspelled compliment. ("you're CUTE! who's cute? hey! *people walk up* what's the best word to describe aubrey? it has four letters, and starts with a 'c' and ends with a 't' and has a 'u' in the middle!" ".... aubrey's a cunt?" "NOOOOOOOO NO NO NO NO. it's 4 letters. starts with a 'c', and has a 't' IN it, ends with an.... 'e'...." *people walking away*)

the funny thing is that i don't mind, mostly. huh.

i was working today and was en route with a hand truck to grab some cases of paper to take up front, and a woman in a business suit stopped me. "excuse me, hun, would you be able to call one of the MEN over here to load up a couple of cases of this paper into my cart?" i told her i would be happy to do it for her. she said, looking me over "are you SURE? i mean.. you're a WOMAN." i loaded up her cart and finished doing a few things, then was called up front to do a carry out. it was the same woman, and i inwardly giggled heartily. egads, if i was too afraid of lifting howevermanypounds because i had tits, i would never have been able to make it out in the world. hee hee. it reminds me of when i lived in my own apartment for YEARS in phoenix, and someone would come over for the first time and inadvertantly get the wrong apartment. they would knock on the wrong door, someone would answer, and they would ask if they knew me or knew where i lived. every. single. time., the response would be the same: "oh, you mean the girl that lives by HERSELF?!?" as if that were some sort of anathema. i remember talking to several females in phoenix and them looking at me as if my eyeball had suddenly fallen out of my head and rolled over to land at their feet. "so, do you have a husband?" "no, i'm single." "oh, so you live with a roommate?" "... no, i live by myself." "by yourSELF?!? wow. doesn't that get... i mean, it's so SAD. don't you get lonely?" "um, i've never been happier, i never have to worry about the ice cream being gone when i get home or the last towel being used when i thought it was there, never had to clean up after anyone other than myself."

actually, strike that. i think i got that response from more men than i had women.

i had several friends in phoenix that exuded feminine strength, too. littledevi, who lived by herself and was surrounded by everything she had worked for. nutty, who i had seen grow so much from when i first met her, and who was unfortunately subjected to the whole Miranda issue of "just you?" "yes, just me." when she bought her condo. even Tiffany, who had built her own life by herself, (although still in the same complex as her mother)...

egads. it just baffles me that after everything that we've all been through as a society, that it's still as... well, as broken down as it is.


( 24 comments — Leave a comment )
(Deleted comment)
Nov. 24th, 2004 07:29 pm (UTC)
this is truly the first time that i've been happy with a roommate. i don't think we've fought once, other than little spitting here and there on one of our sides (usually because of PMS and/or being sick). i sort of miss living by myself for SO many reasons, though i've become kind of addicted to not always coming home to an empty apartment :)

i grew so much as an individual in the 6 years i lived completely by myself. it's so freaking uplifting to know that, other than once, i was always always always able to make it through anything and everything, ON MY OWN.

it's funny, too, because i have gone from being completely on my own and independant in every single way to being happy living with a roommate, though i may not exactly HAVE to. it's good to find a best friend that you can love and actually LIVE with. (Lord knows i've tried in the past!) i mourned the loss of a vehicle for so very long, but i've almost come to be a tree hugging hippy that is happy that she doesn't have a car: the public transit system is adequate here, most everything i need is within walking distance anyway, and there is SO much you miss by being in a car instead of on foot.

maybe i should get a bike.
Nov. 24th, 2004 05:04 am (UTC)
If I could afford to live on my own, I would be doing just that right now!
Nov. 24th, 2004 07:30 pm (UTC)
part of me wants to think that i would be.. i mean, when i was working 2 jobs, i could feasibly live by myself, but it IS nice not always coming home to an empty house, as solitary as i am :)
Nov. 24th, 2004 05:08 am (UTC)
these are the calls I get at work:
stupid woman: "What kind of degrees do you offer at your school?"
me: "We're an industrial technology school we offer homebuilding, welding, diesel mechanics...:
stupid woman: "Oh, you're a school for men, do you offer any classes for women?"
me on the inside: you mean like home economics or how to make love to your man and how to be an obiedient wife 101?
Nov. 24th, 2004 07:36 pm (UTC)
hee hee hee. i LOVE to see the expression on people's faces when i tell them that i went to school to become a union carpenter, and that i was the only female in the entire crew.

i remember how, when i first started going, they were giving me such a hard time and acting as if they were going to have to carry me throughout everything that we did, and dropped MAJOR hints that i should go to business occupations or culinary arts where i belonged.

immediately, though, i started passing those that had been in the program MUCH longer than i had, and worked just as hard, if not harder than them. they instantly became my posse, and threatened to kick anyone's ass that gave me a hard time. i freaking LOVED that :D :D :D

unfortunately, i had had my carpal tunnel surgery like not even a year before i was in the program, so it severely irritated my wrist, and i DID end up going to business occupations. but i made such a great group of friends while i was there, and it helped to give me an edge to things later on (not to mention a massive LOVE of building things!)

it always irritates me that people put boy or girl labels on such things. egads, if we all conformed to those images, just think of all the FUN we would miss!
Nov. 24th, 2004 06:57 am (UTC)
someday, i'll have an apartment OF MY VERY OWN! and probably a kitten. yes, a kitten.
Nov. 24th, 2004 07:37 pm (UTC)
kittens are fantastic.

right up to the moment where you stick your scratched raw hand into the pickle jar.
Nov. 25th, 2004 04:51 am (UTC)
been there, done that, have the scars :)
(Deleted comment)
Nov. 24th, 2004 07:40 pm (UTC)
i had a great time living on my own, it has it's own benefits, by FAR.

if you can find someone that you can actually get along with LIVING with them, it's not half bad. you always have someone to whine to when you come home from a bad day :)
Nov. 24th, 2004 05:46 pm (UTC)
I am totally jealous of women who live on their own. I will do that one day, hopefully very soon, but more than likely, later than I'd hope. I so admire Mary, who has done pretty well for herself, even without a car. I'd trade my car for my own place.


One day..
Nov. 29th, 2004 07:15 pm (UTC)
hee hee i used to think that, too, but now i'm actually quite happy with a roommate and no car. and you've made great leaps and bounds since i met you, hun, so maybe one day!
Nov. 26th, 2004 08:03 am (UTC)
on the other hand i always like the assumption that since i'm a guy i should easily be able to haul around heavy things with a grunt ;)

and what the? i would of easily jump to the word cute! like, DUH and it's true.
Nov. 29th, 2004 07:29 pm (UTC)
lol i so didn't get the 2nd part of your reply until i went and reread it ;)

yeah, yesterday at work, we had only one guy working, and he hurt his wrist, so all of us girls were doing all the furniture pulls and carryouts. i've become much stronger than i used to be, however, i still have to get over the fear of THE MASSIVE, SKINNY, RICKETY LADDERS and pulling down GIGANTIC AWKWARD BOXES with heavy chairs in them.
Nov. 29th, 2004 09:25 pm (UTC)
yeah it must have been some what late night-ish as it took me a couple times to get it as well ;)

egads, i can understand! it's not a fear of heights it's more that in that situation it's a massive build up of probability of falling!
Dec. 1st, 2004 08:34 pm (UTC)

i even have a MASSIVE fear of freaking stepping off the curb wrong, let alone falling 10 feet from the top of a ladder, face first! (which is how it would happen, since you would be flipped from the top of it off...)
Dec. 2nd, 2004 03:56 pm (UTC)
i step of curbs wrong all the time...egads.
Dec. 3rd, 2004 06:06 am (UTC)
that just gave me chills.
Dec. 3rd, 2004 03:44 pm (UTC)

actually, it's been awhile. somehow i've been sleepwalking my way to work with out tripping or anything.
Jun. 9th, 2005 04:44 pm (UTC)
for some reason, stepping off a curb wrong is one of my massive fears all the freaking time. i see a curb and my stomach flips, it's so bad.
Jun. 9th, 2005 04:47 pm (UTC)
It's a good thing to be careful about. Mistep, face plant into the asphalt, right in the middle of the road. Yargh.
Feb. 20th, 2006 03:04 am (UTC)
ha ha, that almost happened to me at Target the other year. I was walking along a curb, waiting for a car to pass... they stepped on their gas, my ankle twisted off the side, and i went flailing in front of their car.

didn't fall, but i'm certain we both peed a little.
Feb. 25th, 2006 01:29 am (UTC)
eek! i just took a digger in my mom's carport. i landed right on the concrete just only like a friggin foot from this rug.
Nov. 23rd, 2006 01:31 am (UTC)
Nov. 23rd, 2006 11:49 am (UTC)
sudden fall!
( 24 comments — Leave a comment )


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