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Ho Fucking Ho Ho.

the holidays are going to be the NED of me. er. end. END, I TELL YOU. *sob* work is so freaking strenuous that i constantly wish i was at home. no, scratch that, it's so freaking busy and slammed and stressful that all i want to do IS GO TO THE FARKING BATHROOM. seriously. for the last two days, i've had to give at LEAST a three hours notice before i tinkled, and even then, it was pulling tooth and nail to get the hell a-WAY from my register and into the toidee.

well, not INTO, in a Trainspotting sorta way, but yanno...

thankfully, the majority of the customers have been actually okay, though the REAL stinkers are the jerks calling from the comfort of their homes and getting pissy because they've been on hold a whopping THREE MINUTES. unkay. i'm standing here, the only person out of *waves arms in an emphatic movement that involves her entire upper torso* all the people up here that actually answers the phone, i'm doing a delivery order, answering three questions WHILE on the floor and rolling a chair mat for another customer WHILE I'M WEARING A SKIRT. yes, sir, every single employee we OWN is currently on a register, so there is no one to help you. please listen to more of The Carpenters Christmas while holding. kay, thanks.

which brings me to another point: although i'm bloated as a dead fish this week to *urp* my BLEEDING, OOZING UTERUS, it's not really a good idea to wear my long, tight skirt to work during the holiday rush. i shimmied up more ladders and pulled more furniture today than i think i have the rest of the week combined.

i also got pulled into the office by Tony and told that i have a rotten attitude and that i need to watch what i say in front of the customers (mainly referring to yesterday when he walked in, i was holding my thighs very tightly together to prevent leakage and i said that i needed to go potty, and that i have needed to go potty for HOURS, can i please freaking go? the customers raised their eyebrows and looked at him, our fearless leader, at such a SHOCKING statement coming from their hired help.)

and my use of the word 'freaking' was attacked, too. i'm sorry, i'm stressed. i know that other people are stressed. unfortunately, if i can't VENT, i'll freaking explode. family stuff isn't helping at ALL, and i do my freaking darnedest to keep home 'issues' separated from work 'issues'...

the month of december is going to freaking be the death of me, i swear. i don't even have an OUNCE of Christmasism in me whatsoever left. the biggest joy i have been able to find is laughing my ass off with faetal as Bacci does silly stuff for us on the stairs.

other than that, i want to do nothing but come home and drink myself into a stupor, although it's barely 5 pm.

but i won't.

life moves on.

there's almost nothing left
you eat my kind for breakfast
what did i expect, to come here and find anyone?


( 42 comments — Leave a comment )
Dec. 16th, 2004 01:27 am (UTC)
I SO don't miss retail! Eep!

It'll end soon just remember that!
Dec. 16th, 2004 02:05 am (UTC)

You're like a slave... that's sooo wrong. When I go shopping tomorrow... I'm gonna be extra nice.
Jun. 18th, 2005 06:34 pm (UTC)
as you should be :)

granted, it's infuriating whenever i go anywhere, having worked in customer service for what... 13? 14? years, and knowing the treatment that i give customers in the way of good customer service, and being able to NOT find it anywhere that i shop. i swear, out of the 80 places that i go, i can find one good customer service place in like maybe two of them.
Dec. 16th, 2004 02:20 am (UTC)
Ack! What the fuck is with wrong with that guy? Is that better than 'freaking?'

I mean, you didn't say you had to piss like a racehorse or anything.

*in snotty Thurston Howell voice*

Excuse me sir, would you mind terribly if I excuse myself to eliminate some liquid waste that I've been holding since four score and seven years ago?

I'd be fired in 30 seconds.
Jun. 18th, 2005 06:45 pm (UTC)
i think that he had been mostly pissed because of the reaction from the customer (a raised eyebrow) as if they had been offended. i think that they were more offended by the fact that they were not letting me go to the bathroom moreso than the fact that i said that i had to go in front of them.

with back to school coming, i'm certain that with everyone being overly stressed, that i'll get another talking to regarding my 'attitude'. *le sigh*
Dec. 16th, 2004 03:06 am (UTC)
what a fucking ASSHOLE! my god, if a person can't pee, then there'll be consequences, especially when there are females involved! you could use the period excuse, and if he wants to see proof, i say give him his bloody (literally) proof.

the fact that the CUSTOMERS weren't understanding is fucking horrible. if i were you, i'd find some sympathetic customer, excuse yourself, and get the fuck to the bathroom. there ARE people that understand. just be sure to announce over the PA that you have to go apply some TP to your BUM.

i come kill for you, yes?
Jun. 18th, 2005 06:48 pm (UTC)
ooh yes, please do. i'm certain that there will be all sorts of recurrances of this now that back to school is impending!

i'm just hoping that they will feel that i'm more valuable on the floor than stuck behind a register so that i can have a bit more freedom of movement. when they were letting me have keys to lockup and stuff, it was really understandable that i was out there, to help management, but now that the new loss prevention manager forbids it...

it's only been two days without keys, and already seeing the MASSIVE strain on managers when there's a trillion customers needing things from 2 different lockups, two cashiers needing change, and countless other management things... i just chuckle at the one lonely manager that has the capability to do it.

i'm hoping that the busier that it gets, that management will freak out and demand that i have my keys back, just to have an extra body out on the floor handling that stuff.
Dec. 16th, 2004 03:21 am (UTC)
Sorry that you are so stressed. It will calm down in a few weeks.

You should at least get bathroom breaks. Do they expect their employees to wear diapers?
Jun. 18th, 2005 06:49 pm (UTC)
catheters, actually.

we were joking about that over the holiday season ;)
Dec. 16th, 2004 04:21 am (UTC)
I'm so sorry, sounds pretty tough right now! Just remember, only two more weeks until 2005 and everything should be calmed down again.
Jun. 18th, 2005 06:50 pm (UTC)
aaah yes, when all the returns and fraudulent returns commences ;) ooh, and then that means that tax season starts, which is when everyone is angry that we don't carry their specific form. and then graduation season. and then back to school. and then ... *dies*

actually, we're currently at the end of our slow season, where we've had a bit of respite from it all (which is good, because it is also the time that everyone had decided suddenly that they wanted different jobs...)
Dec. 16th, 2004 06:56 am (UTC)
i know you're too nice, but you might want to look into your rights as an employee, you CAN take legal action and flashing about a bit of documentation on the subject might help.
At my work you get a break every 2 and a half hours, or it starts to be something that you could have a lawsuit over.
Dec. 16th, 2004 03:59 pm (UTC)
exactly. by law</a> you are entitled to two fifteen minute breaks and at least a half hour lunch in the state of washington. last i checked at least.
(no subject) - faetal - Dec. 16th, 2004 04:32 pm (UTC) - Expand
(no subject) - madmadhatter - Dec. 16th, 2004 05:28 pm (UTC) - Expand
(no subject) - aubkabob - Jun. 18th, 2005 06:59 pm (UTC) - Expand
(no subject) - aubkabob - Jun. 18th, 2005 06:57 pm (UTC) - Expand
(no subject) - madmadhatter - Jun. 20th, 2005 04:28 am (UTC) - Expand
(no subject) - aubkabob - Feb. 20th, 2006 03:53 am (UTC) - Expand
(no subject) - madmadhatter - Feb. 25th, 2006 01:40 am (UTC) - Expand
(no subject) - aubkabob - Nov. 23rd, 2006 01:21 am (UTC) - Expand
(no subject) - madmadhatter - Nov. 23rd, 2006 11:16 am (UTC) - Expand
(no subject) - aubkabob - Jun. 18th, 2005 06:55 pm (UTC) - Expand
(no subject) - madmadhatter - Jun. 20th, 2005 04:29 am (UTC) - Expand
(no subject) - aubkabob - Feb. 20th, 2006 03:57 am (UTC) - Expand
(no subject) - madmadhatter - Feb. 25th, 2006 01:41 am (UTC) - Expand
(no subject) - aubkabob - Nov. 23rd, 2006 01:20 am (UTC) - Expand
(no subject) - madmadhatter - Nov. 23rd, 2006 11:13 am (UTC) - Expand
Dec. 16th, 2004 10:11 am (UTC)
Egads...is this *nasty boss from hell* week or what? Wanna go halves on a laywer? Hey, didn't realize anyone else listened to Toad the Wet Sprocket! Good choice!
Jun. 18th, 2005 06:56 pm (UTC)
yay! of course i do, i heart them greatly. such emotion they have. and apparantly they turn me into yoda, they do.
Dec. 16th, 2004 04:02 pm (UTC)
do hang in their dear. i'm absolutely fucking tired of my job.

if things keep up i suggest a bunch of people get together and start a carnival or circus.
Jun. 18th, 2005 06:58 pm (UTC)
ooh! i can be the bearded lady!
(no subject) - madmadhatter - Jun. 20th, 2005 04:29 am (UTC) - Expand
(no subject) - aubkabob - Feb. 20th, 2006 03:59 am (UTC) - Expand
(no subject) - madmadhatter - Feb. 25th, 2006 01:43 am (UTC) - Expand
(no subject) - madmadhatter - Nov. 23rd, 2006 11:18 am (UTC) - Expand
Dec. 16th, 2004 07:55 pm (UTC)
Youse and me's gonna have a piss-in at your place of work. At a designated moment in the day - our watches synchronized to a whisper of perfection - your manager is going to find us straddling or squatting on - each according to custom and biological apparatus - the merchandise, our emissions indicating what we really think of his precious stock. Who knows if even a few of the customers won't join in too!

Oh, and then we go for dinner and drinks. Something I've been looking forward to now for actual years!
Jun. 18th, 2005 07:01 pm (UTC)
ooh, i say we do it on the most expensive of chairs! woo! and because of your apparatus, you would be able to write your name on the carpet in the furniture pad, too!
Dec. 16th, 2004 09:01 pm (UTC)
ah, the joys of being a woman. Sorry things have been so crappy at work.
Jun. 18th, 2005 07:01 pm (UTC)
i guess work will always be crappy, pretty much no matter who you are. instances change, but stress level is always there.
Dec. 17th, 2004 03:27 pm (UTC)
"find open arms to greet me, and friends to feed me, i sicken myself so much, and you eat my kind for breakfast, you-OOH eat my kind!"

WOOOHOOO! i love that song... it's excellent to warm up da vox to.

you rawk!!
Jun. 18th, 2005 07:02 pm (UTC)
yes. such a depressive song, it is. but an AGRESSIVE depressive song.

glen phillips is da man!
( 42 comments — Leave a comment )


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