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A Letter to the New Year

Dearest 2005;

Heh heh. you sneaky little beast! if the first... WEEK.. of the year is any inclination as to how the rest of the year is going to go, i have to say this:

Let me off now. I think i've gotten on the wrong bus, and instead of enjoying a brand new year with new possibilities, i've had nothing but massive stress after massive stress.

the first little incident being mother in the hospital for congestive heart failure in her left side of her heart. okay, touche. i guess mom needed a wake up call in order to realize that she desperately needs to change her lifestyle, and she really DOESN'T want to die. i can SORT of understand how that could replicate the concept of a new beginning.

blood sugar problems coming back with a vengeance? hee hee yeah, i spose that i've been eating like an idiot for the last few years, not like an intellectual human bee-in who has diabetes running rampant in her family. i've been complaining about being a fat monster, and this would DEFINITELY be a way for me to not only get my weight back under control, but to also feel SO freaking much better. part of me even THANKS you for it.

discovering someone made supervisor instead of me? meh. not that i overly was pushing for it or anything, though i DO feel i'm a good worker. with everything else going on, i SO don't need the extra stress.

but now my freaking FATHER is in the hospital? okay, not MY father, but the man who married my mother when i was two, who also happens to be brosely's father. when i found out, when andrea called me at work to let me know that he had been sent in for a... what was it.. swollen pancreas?!?!? yeah. i got extremely sad. i was on the verge of tears.

but then i laughed. i laffed and i laffed. i thought it was seriously a joke, my mother finally getting out of the hospital, only to have my father go right in for a visit.

and then the anger set in. i'm just angry right now. AAAANGRRYYYY. you were supposed to be a year of joy, of new beginnings, of ideals and dreams come to life. so far, you've been an utter disappointment, and a complete freaking stress.

methinks i'll send my real father an email to make sure that HE isnt set for some random hospital stay soonly, unless you happen to get your evil claws on him AFTER Ray gets out.

in the meantime.... i need a drink. *sip*

Comments

( 49 comments — Leave a comment )
paulscat
Jan. 9th, 2005 02:52 am (UTC)
Ack! {{{HUGS}}}
aubkabob
Jan. 9th, 2005 06:14 pm (UTC)
thanks hun :)
vent - paulscat - Jan. 10th, 2005 02:42 am (UTC) - Expand
sleepymischief
Jan. 9th, 2005 04:05 am (UTC)
i thought of you today, i haven't been reading lj for a while now... but my thoughts did wander into you

aubkabob
Jan. 9th, 2005 06:15 pm (UTC)
awww, as long as your thoughts aren't sharp or jagged, and they didn't run into me with gigantic force (i bruise easily), that's a sweet thought :)

thank you hun. hope all is well with you, too.
ornotmajestic
Jan. 9th, 2005 05:47 am (UTC)
*STABS 2005*

*hugs*
If it's not one thing, it's another.
aubkabob
Jan. 9th, 2005 06:16 pm (UTC)
yup. i wonder what today will bring? i also forgot to mention my bankruptcy, too ;)
(no subject) - ornotmajestic - Jan. 10th, 2005 02:51 am (UTC) - Expand
(no subject) - aubkabob - Jun. 19th, 2005 06:35 pm (UTC) - Expand
(no subject) - ornotmajestic - Jun. 21st, 2005 02:58 am (UTC) - Expand
(no subject) - aubkabob - Feb. 27th, 2006 06:53 am (UTC) - Expand
(no subject) - ornotmajestic - Jan. 10th, 2005 02:52 am (UTC) - Expand
(no subject) - aubkabob - Jun. 19th, 2005 06:36 pm (UTC) - Expand
(no subject) - ornotmajestic - Jun. 21st, 2005 02:57 am (UTC) - Expand
(no subject) - aubkabob - Feb. 27th, 2006 06:50 am (UTC) - Expand
talkingpotato
Jan. 9th, 2005 06:48 am (UTC)
*hugs for Aubrey*
What a stressful beginning for 2005. Darn it, I must have wished on the wrong star for all my friends. The idea was that everyone would NOT be stressed.

I hope that your family members regain their health, maybe when your mom starts being more active, she will find out she has so much to live for and enjoy :-)
aubkabob
Jan. 9th, 2005 06:31 pm (UTC)
Re: *hugs for Aubrey*
i'm hoping so, too, in talking to her last night, it seems that she IS ready for a new start, which makes me feel SO freaking happy, she just doesn't know where TO start. the doctor said that she can't have sweets, can't have simple carbs, can't have salt, and that was pretty much her diet right there, so as i'm getting back into my hypoglycemic diet, i want to help her learn how to shop, and maybe do the shopping for her, too.

an inner fear is that she's made this choice to make things different, but that there's something wrong in her that is too late, that her health has deteriorated too much.
Re: *hugs for Aubrey* - talkingpotato - Jan. 9th, 2005 09:26 pm (UTC) - Expand
Re: *hugs for Aubrey* - aubkabob - Jun. 19th, 2005 06:56 pm (UTC) - Expand
Re: *hugs for Aubrey* - talkingpotato - Jun. 19th, 2005 08:42 pm (UTC) - Expand
Re: *hugs for Aubrey* - aubkabob - Apr. 23rd, 2006 11:43 pm (UTC) - Expand
Re: *hugs for Aubrey* - aubkabob - Jun. 19th, 2005 06:51 pm (UTC) - Expand
Re: *hugs for Aubrey* - talkingpotato - Jun. 19th, 2005 09:05 pm (UTC) - Expand
Re: *hugs for Aubrey* - aubkabob - Apr. 23rd, 2006 11:47 pm (UTC) - Expand
talkingpotato
Jan. 9th, 2005 06:49 am (UTC)
daddgummit I did it again
Ok there is defintely a downside to having this be my default icon because the last thing people want to see on posts like these is death blowing bubbles, I'm really sorry :-( *fairy cuddle*
aubkabob
Jan. 9th, 2005 06:23 pm (UTC)
Re: daddgummit I did it again
LMAO i thought it was appropriate ;) i was also mesmerized by the bubble ;) OOH, does that mean that Death is an enchanter? a lvl 70 enchanter?

hee hee.
Re: daddgummit I did it again - talkingpotato - Jan. 9th, 2005 09:27 pm (UTC) - Expand
Re: daddgummit I did it again - aubkabob - Jun. 19th, 2005 06:38 pm (UTC) - Expand
Re: daddgummit I did it again - talkingpotato - Jun. 19th, 2005 09:05 pm (UTC) - Expand
Re: daddgummit I did it again - aubkabob - Apr. 23rd, 2006 11:48 pm (UTC) - Expand
belenen
Jan. 9th, 2005 07:40 am (UTC)
mlurg. I'm sorry babe...

If we lived close enough I'd go over to your house and give you a real hug, but since I can't:

aubkabob
Jan. 9th, 2005 06:17 pm (UTC)
awwwwwwwww. i felt it all the way over here.

heehee, mlurg.

thank you for making me smile :)
dreamlifeof
Jan. 9th, 2005 09:59 am (UTC)
I'm sorry I haven't spoken to you in so long, especially with all this shit going down. Life is a riddle in an enigma wrapped in a stinking turd sometimes.

I am thinking of you, for what it's worth. One of these days I am coming to Portland to take you away from all this - for half an hour, to a KFC. Or maybe a salad bar of your choosing. We could go to a posh place, with sneeze guards and everything.
aubkabob
Jan. 9th, 2005 06:18 pm (UTC)
rawk! *headbangs* i've been missing you, too, hun, sorry that i haven't been around where i could easily be contacted more!
white_daisies
Jan. 9th, 2005 04:57 pm (UTC)
When it rains, it pours. That's my experience, anyway. It's like, life tries to give you a ton of stuff to see how much you can handle at once.

Have faith, the whole year can't go the same way. You will see sunshine. I love you, Miss Aubrey!
aubkabob
Jan. 9th, 2005 06:18 pm (UTC)
thanks, hun, if nothing else, i can already tell that 2005 will be quite an eventful year for all :)
jenniffer
Jan. 9th, 2005 05:18 pm (UTC)
We've really got to do something about 2005. Maybe we can corner it in a room and have an intervention?

*hugs*

I'm sorry for everything, I guess now all we can do is hope February is a better month.
aubkabob
Jan. 9th, 2005 06:20 pm (UTC)
we need to do SOMETHING. maybe it was my prancing around, hawking about new beginnings and a fresh new year, etc., that made it go "huh? you want new beginnings, lady? HUH!?!?! well HERE you go ;)
wickedcricket
Jan. 10th, 2005 01:03 am (UTC)
Oh dear *hugs*...sending healing thoughts to you and your parents for the health issues...that stuff can be really scary, I know...
aubkabob
Jun. 19th, 2005 06:21 pm (UTC)
thank you, love, your support means a lot (even if i don't tell you until months later!)

i had forgotten what a rocky start 2005 had been for me. i'm still a firm believer that everything happens for a reason, but sheesh, i'm so sick of wondering which parent is going to drop dead first: my mother from eating everything under the sun/moon/stars, my step father from meth overdose, my real father from old age.
aditu
Jan. 10th, 2005 10:41 pm (UTC)
I wish I had something to say that would make it all better... *big tight hugs*
aubkabob
Jun. 19th, 2005 06:24 pm (UTC)
thank you so much for just BEING here. although i'm not overly active in responding to responses or to your posts, i do cherish you as a friend. *hugs*

and of course, every time i post with the new icon that belenen made for me, i think of you ;)
madmadhatter
Jan. 11th, 2005 12:39 am (UTC)
hang in there! *hugs*

i mean, you have to! i have to save up money to come down and go out for drinks sometime. well that or booze it up wherever!
aubkabob
Jun. 19th, 2005 06:26 pm (UTC)
that would be great fun! and you know that if i ever make it up to the seattle area, i'm SO looking you up, too! i think it's really a travesty that i'm 30 years old, living in washington state... that combined, i've lived in this area for... *thinks* over 8 years, and i've only been to seattle once, when i was 15. (not counting the zillions of times i changed greyhounds there when i was in job corps up by spokane..)

granted, i lived in arizona for 8 years, and never saw the grand canyon.
(no subject) - madmadhatter - Jun. 20th, 2005 04:32 am (UTC) - Expand
(no subject) - aubkabob - Feb. 21st, 2006 03:22 am (UTC) - Expand
(no subject) - madmadhatter - Feb. 25th, 2006 01:45 am (UTC) - Expand
(no subject) - aubkabob - Nov. 23rd, 2006 01:19 am (UTC) - Expand
(no subject) - madmadhatter - Nov. 23rd, 2006 11:03 am (UTC) - Expand
( 49 comments — Leave a comment )

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