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Feb. 15th, 2005

valentines day consisted of work. i had totally forgotten that it even WAS vday, and was highly confused at why on earth my roommate and new fiancee were being all incredibly schmoopy together and having battles of making each other things in bed.

i went to work feeling extremely tired for some reason, and downhearted, although it was a massively purdiful day outside. i kept telling myself that it wasn't because i was sad and depressive because of valentines day, because, afterall, i never care any OTHER day of the year that i'm single, that i haven't even been on a date in YEARS. and i DID get a gift, even if it was gigantic chocolate lips to share with andrea, given from a gay man. i also got a free soda from jack in the box, but then, i often do, since i eat practically every meal during work there. (places that know me by name other than work and homelife: jack in the box, barnes and noble cafe, and the shell station.) i also had been doing the whole feeling sorry for myself thing when a guy came in and, as i was discussing digital cameras with him, he said that he had a crush on one of my coworkers and wanted more information on her. meh. so i didn't even have a secret admirer.

i've only had a boyfriend once over valentines day, and that was when i was 16, an entire 13 years ago. *eesh, i'm getting ancient*... i remember borrowing money from mom although she couldnt' really afford it, so i could go out and buy him a little stuffed animal, a rose in a vase, and some m&m's, which was his absolute favorite. he came over after work and i proudly handed him my carefully prepared surprise... and he looked at me sheepishly and said 'aw, i should have told you to not do anything for me, because i wasn't planning on doing anything for you...'

so yes, 13 years later, and i'm still enbittered.

thanks so much to my dearest eldylabor for the beautimous valentine and to my loveliest pertato for the calendar and letter. it DID cheer me up greatly, and i giggled heartily. i love yous.


( 31 comments — Leave a comment )
Feb. 15th, 2005 06:53 pm (UTC)
I'm sorry :-( It was raining and cold over here. I did feel kinda bad especially when I went to the mall for something and I saw all these guys buying stuff for their gfs or wives. I don't celebrate it but the day still makes me feel more single and alone. And then I found out my id was missing so.....
meh I guess the happy part of the day was I got a 'makeup update' so now I can look all dolled up to have men totally ignore me because they have a perfectly awesome gf with no makeup on they are walking next to. Who probably is better looking than me with makeup.
And has a better body.

Ok I'll shut up. I guess the whole point of this comment was *hugs* I'm sorry and yeah V-day kinda reeked for me too.
It's too bad they don't have a day for people who are single to rub it into everyone who has someone, because all we have so far are just a bunch of dates where people with SO's get to grind it in the faces of others how lucky they are they have someone. ANd then you get all the patronizing "oh you will find someone..one day"
and the thing is, it's not that I even want a bf.. it's just I dislike the whole "my life is better because I have ____" because you honestly can't control who you find in life. And going with someone just for the sake of having someone is a really bad idea.
It's like..having a bunch of people with legs prancing around some guy in a wheelchair "WHEEEE! I HAVE LEGS!!" and this guy in the wheelchair has gone through life ok in a wheelchair, and really isn't missing out or anything but still wants to just chuck something at all those 2 leggers prancing about saying how awesome having legs is.
Feb. 15th, 2005 07:33 pm (UTC)
hee hee hee. you always make me laugh. thats why i love you so :)

LOVE the analogy :) and i don't know WHY they don't have a holiday like that. maybe in 20 or so years, it still seems like an anathema to society for people to be single and unwed, but it seems to be changing a bit as we go along.
(no subject) - talkingpotato - Feb. 15th, 2005 08:47 pm (UTC) - Expand
(no subject) - aubkabob - Jul. 13th, 2005 05:08 pm (UTC) - Expand
(no subject) - talkingpotato - Jul. 13th, 2005 06:11 pm (UTC) - Expand
(no subject) - aubkabob - Apr. 24th, 2006 01:13 am (UTC) - Expand
(no subject) - talkingpotato - Apr. 24th, 2006 03:25 am (UTC) - Expand
(no subject) - aubkabob - Nov. 10th, 2006 09:44 pm (UTC) - Expand
Feb. 15th, 2005 07:04 pm (UTC)
heeh curiosity made me check last V-day..I was spending hours installing a hard drive following really vague instructions. It was super frustrating..and then a huge fight days later..

So I guess I'm way better off now :-D At least I don't feel like a retard 24/7 like I did last year.

Feb. 15th, 2005 07:34 pm (UTC)
ooh, i should check that as well :) it's been awhile since i did the whole 'check back each year'... and i seemed to have forgotten my 4 year anniversary with lj, so that should give me some reading material ;)
(no subject) - talkingpotato - Feb. 15th, 2005 08:46 pm (UTC) - Expand
(no subject) - aubkabob - Jul. 13th, 2005 05:00 pm (UTC) - Expand
(no subject) - talkingpotato - Jul. 13th, 2005 05:58 pm (UTC) - Expand
(no subject) - aubkabob - Apr. 24th, 2006 01:08 am (UTC) - Expand
Feb. 15th, 2005 07:06 pm (UTC)
I really saddens me to hear this (we as people need more terms that I'm sorry). If it makes you feel any better I have added you as a friend, something I thought I did a long time ago.

Don't beat yourself up over this and don't settle for less. I too have not been in a realtionship like ever and can be considered quite a novice in terms of experience. All of that was for me to make a point, a point that noew escapes my mind.

Just don't dispare, What can I do to cheer you up?
Feb. 15th, 2005 07:08 pm (UTC)
Re: Awwwwww
aww ;) you cheer me up just by being here. thank you :)
Re: Awwwwww - bigstusexy - Feb. 15th, 2005 08:45 pm (UTC) - Expand
Jul. 13th, 2005 05:10 pm (UTC)
Re: Awwwwww
ha ha, i remember thinking that you hated me or something, that i annoyed you and that's why you didn't add me back for awhile ;) glad to see that's not so.

my mother gave me advice when i was first leaving home, and it holds true today in everything i do:

"live your life for YOU."

and i have. this makes me happy that i've been single and haven't married and been bogged down with children. i can still make my own decisions and live life the way i want to.

though i think my biological clock is ticking a bit now that i'm in MY THIRTIES.
Re: Awwwwww - bigstusexy - Jul. 13th, 2005 05:29 pm (UTC) - Expand
Re: Awwwwww - aubkabob - Jan. 19th, 2006 10:34 pm (UTC) - Expand
Re: Awwwwww - bigstusexy - Jan. 20th, 2006 01:05 am (UTC) - Expand
Feb. 15th, 2005 07:26 pm (UTC)
ive been single every valentines day :/lol
Jul. 21st, 2005 05:19 am (UTC)
silly holiday, anyway.
Feb. 15th, 2005 09:41 pm (UTC)
The last time I had a boyfriend on Valentine's Day, he made the biggest deal about how it's just a corporate holiday created by greeting card companies, blah blah blah...but he would say that on any holiday that people generally exchange gifts on. Truth was, he was just broke all the time.
Jul. 21st, 2005 05:18 am (UTC)
grr, people like that annoy me at times. there's all sorts of things you can do to be THOUGHTFUL on days like that w/o having to spend money and sounding angry about it.
Feb. 15th, 2005 10:30 pm (UTC)
heheeh I'm glad you liked the calendar eheh that's so funny it came to you on Valentines day. It's your Valentines Calendar!
Jul. 21st, 2005 05:17 am (UTC)
it's true! i always remember to flip the month when it's almost through the following month - it's still on june!
(no subject) - talkingpotato - Jul. 21st, 2005 02:34 pm (UTC) - Expand
(no subject) - aubkabob - Apr. 24th, 2006 06:36 am (UTC) - Expand
Feb. 16th, 2005 01:19 am (UTC)
wow, but i bet he ate those m&ms, what a prick.
Jul. 21st, 2005 05:16 am (UTC)
oh yes. i don't think he even shared them with me.
( 31 comments — Leave a comment )


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