Ticklebuddy Wonderpoo (aubkabob) wrote,
Ticklebuddy Wonderpoo
aubkabob

Two years in retrospect...

two years ago, I had been dealing with the anxiety and crap going with a move-on-a-whim to a completely different state. One of thee most emotionally distraught times of my life, I tell you. It seemed like every little thing that could go wrong, did. I fell and hurt my hand. People that said they were coming over to help me never showed. I got my period, so I had horrendous cramps to deal with during the whole packing process. I had days to go through EIGHT YEARS of my life and decide what stayed and what went.

I ended up doing a 'first come, first serve' as to what I could fit into my Jeep. I remember looking around at my apartment after the fact and going 'holy crap, I needed that! But there's no room...', I.e. almost every thread of any professional attire I owned, and a lot of my clothing that I actually wore. My ENTIRE kitchen was left behind. Granted, I was going to get rid of the majority of it; however, there were a couple of mugs I had gotten as gifts that I had wanted to bring along. Part of me wishes fervently that I could go back and do the whole repacking thing over, since I now know what I will use and what I will not, and to relook at everything that was left behind. The other, larger, part of me is VERY happy that is all behind me and that I never have to deal with it again.

Wow. 2003 was such an emotional ride for me. So much happened. An emotional growth spurt, I suppose, in retrospect, but at the time I was going through all of it... Wow. The emotional anxiety and depression at giving up what I had spent eight years to build, on practically a whim. I was totally independent. I went from completely independent to sleeping on my mother's livingroom floor in a one-bedroom apartment with her and brosely, completely jobless. All the skills I had known from jobs before amounted to nothing: no one in the area wanted someone who was a travel agent, rock star, receptionist, property management, or anything else I had been. In trillions of resumes sent out to all sorts of establishments, I only got one job interview, and they gave that property management job to someone who was twice my age. Fine, whatever.

I remember saying at the end of 2002, which had been thee worst year of my life, that I knew that good things were coming. I told everyone who would listen that things were going to happen in 2003, that it was going to serve as a springboard for 2004, which is when everything truly wonderful would happen.

2005 is shaping up to be a good year so far *knocks on wood*... Mayhaps 2003 was the springboard to the 2004 flip and turn which will result in a 10.0 rewarding for a perfect dive into 2005?

Yes. You heard it. I admit it. I actually kinda like being 30.

But don't tell anyone.
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