this morning, for example, i woke up ten minutes AFTER i had to leave in order to be to michaels on time. so what did my brainful head do in response? turned off the alarm and rolled over and slept until noon thirty. meh?! so i had to call them yet AGAIN and explain why i had a no call no show. again. sonja was surprisingly jovial about the whole thing, after i agonized over it for two hours before even picking up the phone. i just so very much hate showing up 10 or more min late, having to ring the bell to get in, and facing denise (or other, but usually denise) when she has to walk all the way up to let me in and FACE her as she's staring at me and unlocking the door, and having to have her repeat herself as to what she needs done in the store, when she's already given the schpiel to all the other workers who were on time. i kept saying that i felt i was a better worker than a lot of the hired Christmas help, ... but when i actually show up. on time.
a lot of beating myself up over it was because of incoming school. hell, if i can't manage to get myself to work at 7 am each day, at ALL, for only 3 days a week, how the hell am i going to handle working 35 hours and getting to SCHOOL at seven freaking a.m. on time FIVE days a week? what is WRONG with me?!? why am i screwing up everything this month? gah. i really hate me right now.
in other news, when i went to Clark yesterday, because i have been playing EQ again, it felt like i was on a lengthy quest or task:
aubrey: Hail, a Financial Aid Advisor!
FAA: Hail, fair traveller.
aubrey: i need to complete my [financial aid papers]!
FAA: Great! in order to complete this task, I need for you to fetch me one [final form], along with the tails of [two online forms] from the computer there.
*aubrey goes and kills said forms and collects tails*
*hands them over*
FAA: Great! Thank you, Aubrey, for your assistance in this matter. We now need you to obtain [text books] for your journey.
*aubrey heads to book store*
*finds her two algebra books*
*gives them to cashier*
Cashier: Good work, Aubrey!
Your faction with Clark has increased.
Your faction with friends has increased.
Your faction with second job has decreased.
*aubrey heads over to the advisors office, fills out a form and hands to receptionist*
*experience music sounds loudly*
Receptionist: Thank you, Aubrey! I need you to med for a few moments, as there is only one health advisor working today.
*aubrey meds and forages for a bit*
You have become better at Reading Robert Jordan! (56)
Advisor: Hail, Aubrey! What can i [help] you with today?
Aubrey: I need to get a pin number
Aubrey: fine, i need HELP obtaining a pin number.
Advisor: Indeed, young traveller! the number you seek is... blah.
Aubrey: i also need HELP getting a student i.d.
Advisor: Wonderful news! Travel the trecherous hallways and visit the security desk. There, you will find a [seeker of safety] to help you with the next step.
*aubs wanders the hallways and finds desk*
aubrey: hail, a security officer! I seek a [student i.d.]!
SO: *looks up from desk and looks you up and down, deciding if you are friend or foe* Certainly, Aubrey, we need you to bring us one [winter schedule], and a [receipt] from the book store for $3.
*aubrey travels all over the Gaiser Zone obtaining items*
*gives them to SO*
Your faction with Clark College Security has Increased.
Your faction with Just Graduated Hoodlums has Decreased.
SO: fantastic, fair traveller, we just need you to pose for a picture!
etc. i'm done.