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this post has been un-sugar coated.

yes, i hath returned. i couldn't completely delete my journal, anyway, although i became so unenamored with things in livejournal and my circle of 'friends' that i had to do .. SOMETHING. and since i couldn't even stand to look at aubkabob any longer, i deleted it.

what triggered it, you ask? (i knew you would.) basically, after working 50-60 hours a week over the holidays, getting little to no sleep, and stressing out over going back to school after a 12 year absence, things were a bit strenuous. you will remember, too, that i was working so much that i even pulled an almost 24 hour shift, getting little sleep, and going in for another however many hours. i put in over 40 hours within 3 1/2 days at one job, neveryoumind how many i put in at the other job, too.

shortly after my last post on the first, some of you had the GALL to tell me i was an awful friend because i hadn't been reading your journal, or responding to posts or responses. one person occasionally, i could understand, but suddenly many of you were coming out of the woodwork to tell me what a horrible person i was because i wasn't stopping in my busy REAL life in order to pet and pamper your egos.

you know what? i have a life. granted, my life isn't overly exciting, but it is a LIFE. i do adore my online friends greatly. i feel closer to some of you than i do to most people IN this real life i lead. however, the way i tend to my journal... remember. it is MY journal. i have stated several times that even in good, slow times, i can tend to take up to six months to respond to things. if you don't like it? there's the door. i will not be offended if you delete me because you feel that we don't have enough interaction. i WILL, however, be offended if you decide to attack ME.

i'm certain that things will certainly change now that i am in school, too. last week, i worked 42 hours from 330 pm to late night, as WELL as went to school from 7 am until noon, EVERY DAY. my life is now consisting of only work and school and very little sleep. i'm certain that the topic of my posts will change, too, as i have realized that i actually REALLY like this school thing, and thusly will be blabbering about it quite extensively. if you don't like it? again, defriend me, and no offense will be taken.

this post may seem harsh, and for that, i do NOT apologize. this is also not geared towards one person, but towards all of you. if you do not like me and how i keep my journal or deal with my responses, this is your easy way out. i have zero time or emotions to devote to pampering your asses. if you are willing to take me as i am, good and the bad, and are able to have civilized conversations, by all means, feel free to stay.

Comments

( 146 comments — Leave a comment )
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(Deleted comment)
aubkabob
Jan. 10th, 2006 02:34 am (UTC)
as i had said, this wasn't geared towards any one person. yours i can sort of understand, as you were completely drunk at the time, but i highly doubt that everyone involved has excuses like that.

i'm just sick of dealing with dumb drama.
(no subject) - aubkabob - Jan. 10th, 2006 02:39 am (UTC) - Expand
(no subject) - frosty_pickle - Jan. 10th, 2006 02:58 am (UTC) - Expand
(no subject) - 0vary - Jan. 10th, 2006 03:30 am (UTC) - Expand
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(no subject) - soulresilience - Jan. 10th, 2006 03:45 am (UTC) - Expand
Fishing. - faetal - Jan. 10th, 2006 04:08 am (UTC) - Expand
Re: Fishing. - aubbieincognito - Jan. 10th, 2006 05:10 am (UTC) - Expand
(no subject) - 0vary - Jan. 10th, 2006 05:15 am (UTC) - Expand
(Deleted comment)
Re: Fishing. - 0vary - Jan. 10th, 2006 05:25 am (UTC) - Expand
Re: Fishing. - aubkabob - Aug. 7th, 2006 10:45 pm (UTC) - Expand
(no subject) - wallbrat - Jan. 10th, 2006 05:43 am (UTC) - Expand
(no subject) - faetal - Jan. 15th, 2006 01:32 am (UTC) - Expand
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(no subject) - faetal - Jan. 15th, 2006 03:18 am (UTC) - Expand
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(no subject) - faetal - Jan. 15th, 2006 04:54 am (UTC) - Expand
(no subject) - wallbrat - Jan. 15th, 2006 04:56 am (UTC) - Expand
(no subject) - faetal - Jan. 15th, 2006 05:12 am (UTC) - Expand
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(no subject) - faetal - Jan. 15th, 2006 05:37 am (UTC) - Expand
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(no subject) - aubkabob - Aug. 7th, 2006 10:42 pm (UTC) - Expand
(no subject) - faetal - Jan. 10th, 2006 04:01 am (UTC) - Expand
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(no subject) - wallbrat - Jan. 10th, 2006 06:01 am (UTC) - Expand
(no subject) - frosty_pickle - Jan. 10th, 2006 06:10 am (UTC) - Expand
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Re: sorry but i just had to comment... - wallbrat - Jan. 11th, 2006 11:06 am (UTC) - Expand
(Deleted comment)
Re: sorry but i just had to comment... - wallbrat - Jan. 11th, 2006 11:28 am (UTC) - Expand
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Re: sorry but i just had to comment... - wallbrat - Jan. 11th, 2006 11:43 am (UTC) - Expand
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Re: sorry but i just had to comment... - wallbrat - Jan. 11th, 2006 11:50 am (UTC) - Expand
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Re: sorry but i just had to comment... - wallbrat - Jan. 11th, 2006 11:30 am (UTC) - Expand
(no subject) - wallbrat - Jan. 11th, 2006 11:05 am (UTC) - Expand
some_person
Jan. 10th, 2006 02:34 am (UTC)
I'm glad to see you back. I enjoy your posts. :)
aubkabob
Jan. 10th, 2006 02:36 am (UTC)
thank you for not leaving me during my abscence. i deleted everyone who did, even if they were just cleaning their friends list so as to not have scritched out names on their info. if they are meant to find me again, they will.

i'm certain that having my giant friends list drop from 371 to 331 in a week helped a bit, too.
a_muse_d
Jan. 10th, 2006 02:35 am (UTC)
hell, i deleted my journal last winter, i don't hold it against people if they do so, themselves. it's another reason why i haven't been looking at my "friend of" section in my userinfo.. i'm making a point to not see it. i did some friend deleting myself over the last month because of my own stress. do what you want, just know that i'll wonder what the hell happened to you if/when i notice that your journal is gone.

..now will you pamper my ass? ;)
aubkabob
Jan. 10th, 2006 02:39 am (UTC)
no, but i'll powder it.

come to mama.
(no subject) - a_muse_d - Jan. 10th, 2006 03:32 am (UTC) - Expand
shinzakura
Jan. 10th, 2006 02:41 am (UTC)
Glad to see that you are back. I for one understand completely what you mean. Your journal is your window to the world, not the place where people go so you can entertain them on demand like a marionette.
johnkeats
Jan. 10th, 2006 02:43 am (UTC)
Welcome back. I was wondering what had caused you to delete.
Real life always takes priority to journaling. I'm lucky that
all things considered my job hours are pretty easy. It was not
always like that. I used to work 16 to 18 hours days when I
worked at Archway cookies. When you do those kind of hours your
damn tired when you get home. I think its perfectly reasonable
that you would rather unwind then reply. Good luck on the school
front. If you can survive the hours you work then I'm certain
you have the determination to do great in school.
aubkabob
Sep. 4th, 2006 08:01 pm (UTC)
egads, what did you do there that caused you to have to work 18 hours? sheesh, that's a lotta cookies!

and thank you so much for your support for school and everything else over the years!
geminigirl
Jan. 10th, 2006 02:44 am (UTC)
I was rather baffled to come back from Canada and see you gone. I'm glad you're back.
aubkabob
Sep. 4th, 2006 08:02 pm (UTC)
i always hide from people when they go to canada ;) j/k. i think.

i promise to never disappear completely. unless i'm dead, of course.
also_huey
Jan. 10th, 2006 02:44 am (UTC)
In the words of the great Roman prophet Kris Kristofferson, "Nil illegitimus carborundum". Don't let the bastards get you down.
aubkabob
Sep. 4th, 2006 08:03 pm (UTC)
i will always do my bestest. it definitely helps that i have such a wonderful group of friends (such as yourself!) to help me through things!

yay!

GROUP HUG.
dbaxdevilsfan
Jan. 10th, 2006 02:50 am (UTC)
Wait, people were actually pissed because you were earning a living and not telling them how wonderful & great they are? WTF?! I was wondering what happened to you. I'm glad to see you back though!!!!

You post when you have the time, and feel like it. I'm anxious to hear all about school, and how it's going!
aubkabob
Sep. 4th, 2006 08:05 pm (UTC)
thank you, my dear! you have always been nothing but absosmurfly wonderful to me! maybe it was the phase of the moon or the holiday blues or something like that, which caused people to come out of the woodwork and attack others like that. i seem to have since weeded out those people on my friends list that aren't understanding that i disappear from time to time and that i take sometimes literally a year to respond to comments!
bostondave
Jan. 10th, 2006 02:50 am (UTC)
WOOOOHOOO!!!
capitalsax
Jan. 10th, 2006 02:51 am (UTC)
It is good to see you back, but you are absolutely correct. I personally quite like you as you are, and enjoy my aubkabob posts, but I can't always comment. And I have a dramitcally smaller f-list than you. This should be a safe place for you, and when it ceases to be that, you should make it that way. just my .02.
aubkabob
Sep. 4th, 2006 08:06 pm (UTC)
thank you soooo very much, my dear! i think it helped a lot when i deleted like 200 people from my friends list shortly after making this post. those that remained, i think, were slowly weeded out if they didn't like my posting/commenting proceedures, or the fact that sometimes it takes me literally a year to respond to things!
xkmfdm80525x
Jan. 10th, 2006 02:58 am (UTC)
I never thought anything negative of you, we all have lives. Glad that you're back!!
botched_surgery
Jan. 10th, 2006 03:02 am (UTC)
I've been dropped by people because I'm not on LJ 24/7 and don't comment on every single one of their entries...because, like you, I HAVE a life. Ugh...believe me, I understand your frustration. That drama and absurdity I can do without too. I'm glad you came back despite those attention-seekers.
aubkabob
Sep. 4th, 2006 08:08 pm (UTC)
i still see a ton of people posting in the addme communities that say 'i'm looking for people that comment a lot...'... egads. i'm sorry that i have a life and can't linger on every single word of every single person. even if i had zero life (which it feels like at times) i have a very short attention span, so...
leighblack
Jan. 10th, 2006 03:03 am (UTC)
Welcome back! I missed your posts. =)
aubkabob
Sep. 4th, 2006 08:08 pm (UTC)
thank you, my dear, i promise not to disappear forever!

except in death.

dun Dun DUNNNNN.
(Deleted comment)
aubkabob
Sep. 4th, 2006 08:11 pm (UTC)
thank you so much, my dear! i think people have eventually realized (hopefully) that everyone's mannerisms don't always match their mannerisms. i think that i've finally sent the message across about how i handle this eljay thing, as i went from people adding me and deleting me all the time to very few deletions.

thank you so much for sticking around through the years!
(Deleted comment)
(no subject) - aubkabob - Sep. 4th, 2006 08:22 pm (UTC) - Expand
grinningskull
Jan. 10th, 2006 03:11 am (UTC)
Hell, I'm just glad that you are still alive. I was worried.
aubkabob
Jan. 10th, 2006 03:15 am (UTC)
ha ha, wouldn't that be something that if the second someone died, so did their lj? ;)

sorry to cause worry. i would never disappear completely (i was given a gift of a permanent account last year, i couldn't squander THAT!), but had to get away COMPLETELY for awhile.

and amazing how well a friends cut takes care of itself when you delete your journal for a week! i had planned to wait a month, but i couldn't stay away that long. there are too many posts i wanted to make.
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