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this post has been un-sugar coated.

yes, i hath returned. i couldn't completely delete my journal, anyway, although i became so unenamored with things in livejournal and my circle of 'friends' that i had to do .. SOMETHING. and since i couldn't even stand to look at aubkabob any longer, i deleted it.

what triggered it, you ask? (i knew you would.) basically, after working 50-60 hours a week over the holidays, getting little to no sleep, and stressing out over going back to school after a 12 year absence, things were a bit strenuous. you will remember, too, that i was working so much that i even pulled an almost 24 hour shift, getting little sleep, and going in for another however many hours. i put in over 40 hours within 3 1/2 days at one job, neveryoumind how many i put in at the other job, too.

shortly after my last post on the first, some of you had the GALL to tell me i was an awful friend because i hadn't been reading your journal, or responding to posts or responses. one person occasionally, i could understand, but suddenly many of you were coming out of the woodwork to tell me what a horrible person i was because i wasn't stopping in my busy REAL life in order to pet and pamper your egos.

you know what? i have a life. granted, my life isn't overly exciting, but it is a LIFE. i do adore my online friends greatly. i feel closer to some of you than i do to most people IN this real life i lead. however, the way i tend to my journal... remember. it is MY journal. i have stated several times that even in good, slow times, i can tend to take up to six months to respond to things. if you don't like it? there's the door. i will not be offended if you delete me because you feel that we don't have enough interaction. i WILL, however, be offended if you decide to attack ME.

i'm certain that things will certainly change now that i am in school, too. last week, i worked 42 hours from 330 pm to late night, as WELL as went to school from 7 am until noon, EVERY DAY. my life is now consisting of only work and school and very little sleep. i'm certain that the topic of my posts will change, too, as i have realized that i actually REALLY like this school thing, and thusly will be blabbering about it quite extensively. if you don't like it? again, defriend me, and no offense will be taken.

this post may seem harsh, and for that, i do NOT apologize. this is also not geared towards one person, but towards all of you. if you do not like me and how i keep my journal or deal with my responses, this is your easy way out. i have zero time or emotions to devote to pampering your asses. if you are willing to take me as i am, good and the bad, and are able to have civilized conversations, by all means, feel free to stay.

Comments

( 146 comments — Leave a comment )
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scrumbles
Jan. 10th, 2006 03:22 am (UTC)
Sorry for my misbehavior, I was drunk too.
aubkabob
Jan. 10th, 2006 03:33 am (UTC)
mrh?
(no subject) - scrumbles - Jan. 10th, 2006 04:04 am (UTC) - Expand
(no subject) - aubkabob - Jan. 10th, 2006 04:28 am (UTC) - Expand
(no subject) - aubkabob - Aug. 7th, 2006 10:49 pm (UTC) - Expand
marjun
Jan. 10th, 2006 03:25 am (UTC)
I don't comment often, but I read everything. I was very suprised to see your journal deleted, and wondered what had happened.
aubkabob
Sep. 4th, 2006 08:13 pm (UTC)
i've only deleted my journal once before, in the entire history of its being (my life here on livejournal almost reaching 6 years now...), and the first one didn't last 24 hours. i figured that i'm due a journal deletion to do... whatever... approximately once every two or so years!

sorry to worry you!
inisfair
Jan. 10th, 2006 03:29 am (UTC)
I feel pampered already.
aubkabob
Sep. 4th, 2006 08:14 pm (UTC)
as you should.

you manly manly man, you.
coupesetique
Jan. 10th, 2006 03:30 am (UTC)
Hey kiddo,

Glad to see that you're back. Looking forward to reading your posts about school. :-)
aubkabob
Jan. 10th, 2006 04:34 am (UTC)
your icon made me gaffaw.
(no subject) - coupesetique - Jan. 10th, 2006 05:00 am (UTC) - Expand
(no subject) - aubkabob - Jan. 10th, 2006 05:04 am (UTC) - Expand
(no subject) - coupesetique - Jan. 10th, 2006 05:32 am (UTC) - Expand
(no subject) - aubkabob - Sep. 4th, 2006 08:16 pm (UTC) - Expand
aditu
Jan. 10th, 2006 03:34 am (UTC)
I've understood how busy you are, and having a huge friend's list doesn't help. It's kind of fun getting replies to old replies/posts sometimes too. :) I'm glad school is going well for you. *hugs*
aubkabob
Sep. 4th, 2006 08:19 pm (UTC)
thank you, my dear! now that i'm getting ready to start my 4th quarter back, i'm noticing a nice process going:

- i get excited for school.
- i jump head long into school and aggressively tackle my subjects.
- i start to get worn down.
- my fear of succeeding kicks in (usually when there's about 3 weeks of school left.)
- i start to be filled with anxiety and longing for the quarter to just be OVER.
- the quarter ends, much better than anticipated.
- i'm ecstatic that school is DONE for awhile.
- i start to get anxious because i'm not in school.
- i become frantic to get back IN school..

repeat each quarter.
akteri
Jan. 10th, 2006 03:35 am (UTC)
Whoever it was getting VERY pissy about that needs to be slapped, beat upside the head, and then sentenced to a long life within the confines of a prison that does nothing but show Backstreet Boys, *NSYNC, Britney Spears, and Christina Aguilera music.


life gets in the way sometimes, and we should ALL understand that as it happens to us all.

*hugs* glad you decided not to delete the journal :)
aubkabob
Sep. 4th, 2006 08:20 pm (UTC)
thank you, my dear! i could never permanently delete this journal, it has too entirely much of my past in it. i can relearn so much about myself by going back and reading old posts.
bigstusexy
Jan. 10th, 2006 03:38 am (UTC)
Amen. This is your life and you have to take responsibility and control of it. It's no one else's but your own and you may/can do whatever you want to do with it. I wish the best for you and look out for rocks along the path as much as I can but that doesn't include that you look at mine or my journal for that matter.

I really thought you were pushing yourself way past the red line in the past few weeks but sometimes you've gotta do what you've gotta do. Just the next time you delete your journal can you give a little heads up :) Scared the freaking mess out of me when I noticed, I hope my message didn't sound too frantic.

With all that said and wanting to blend into the darkness, I wish you good luck and best wishes. Congrats on getting back I know you'll do well

Stu-
aubkabob
Jan. 10th, 2006 04:29 am (UTC)
the fact that you called really meant a lot to me, thank you :)
(no subject) - bigstusexy - Jan. 10th, 2006 12:27 pm (UTC) - Expand
(no subject) - aubkabob - Sep. 4th, 2006 08:21 pm (UTC) - Expand
(no subject) - bigstusexy - Sep. 5th, 2006 12:42 pm (UTC) - Expand
(no subject) - aubkabob - Nov. 5th, 2006 10:56 pm (UTC) - Expand
(no subject) - bigstusexy - Nov. 6th, 2006 02:01 am (UTC) - Expand
everlastinggoo
Jan. 10th, 2006 04:07 am (UTC)
I like you, and the way you keep your journal! I just didn't know where you had gone when your name had the lil line through it on my friends page....I was sad, but you're back now so YAY!!! *Does a happy little jig*
hazard77506
Jan. 10th, 2006 04:13 am (UTC)
Oh sweet jepus! I can't believe peopel rode your ass for not being a good enough LJ friend! loL! what are we in 3rd grade still!?

Glad to see you back :) Please ignore idiots in the future...

rock_starlette
Jan. 10th, 2006 04:27 am (UTC)
Ugh, LJ drama! Not so fun. Sorry for the mess, and I hope it clears up.
aubkabob
Sep. 4th, 2006 08:22 pm (UTC)
thank you, my dear, it all seems to have worked itself out!
hotarunokokoro
Jan. 10th, 2006 05:29 am (UTC)
i'm sorry people said mean things to you like that... gosh... i could see that you were busy and such! i cant believe that people couldnt see how busy you were with work and school...
friends ar forever...
nasagrl
Jan. 10th, 2006 05:29 am (UTC)
I'm glad you're here. Also? Threaded!
aubkabob
Sep. 4th, 2006 08:23 pm (UTC)
indeeeed! my temper tantrum even resulted in THREE PAGES OF COMMENTS! my law.
wallbrat
Jan. 10th, 2006 05:37 am (UTC)
Not harsh at all. I say it's about damned time. *hugs her*
aubkabob
Sep. 4th, 2006 08:24 pm (UTC)
i rarely have a tantrum or get overly angry about anything...
(no subject) - wallbrat - Sep. 4th, 2006 09:35 pm (UTC) - Expand
wallbrat
Jan. 10th, 2006 06:03 am (UTC)
*pounces* Welcome back. *grins*

Now there's this small matter of my delivering a present.

Just saying.....

*impish grin*
wallbrat
Jan. 10th, 2006 06:04 am (UTC)
What can I say? You're not truly back until you've been pounced and I got distracted from doing it. *chuckles*
(no subject) - aubkabob - Sep. 4th, 2006 08:29 pm (UTC) - Expand
(no subject) - wallbrat - Sep. 4th, 2006 09:39 pm (UTC) - Expand
(no subject) - aubkabob - May. 8th, 2009 02:42 am (UTC) - Expand
(no subject) - wallbrat - May. 9th, 2009 05:35 pm (UTC) - Expand
(no subject) - aubkabob - Sep. 4th, 2006 08:28 pm (UTC) - Expand
(no subject) - wallbrat - Sep. 4th, 2006 09:36 pm (UTC) - Expand
duffy61
Jan. 10th, 2006 06:07 am (UTC)
Hi, aub, nice to see your name on my flist again.

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