- Ball may be placed into play only by cat.
- Cat may not touch ball when on tile, biped may not touch ball when on carpet.
- Cat gains points for each second biped doesn't notice the ball is in their play (meaning: on the tile).
- Biped gains points for each second it takes cat to retrieve the ball from dining room.
- Cat wins game when biped plays long enough to bore cat. Prize: something else shiny to occupy its attention, or possibly a good self crotch cleaning.
- Biped wins game when ball is accidentally kicked into cat's water bowl, thusly splashing cat. Reward: dirty, offended look from cat.
These are the rules always observed while I'm cooking in the kitchen. It is now written law.