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Rules of Kitchen Soccer

- The middle "net" is the metal bar on the floor that separates the tile in the kitchen from the carpet in the dining room. Carpet side is cat's home side, tile side is biped's home side.

- Ball may be placed into play only by cat.

- Cat may not touch ball when on tile, biped may not touch ball when on carpet.

- Cat gains points for each second biped doesn't notice the ball is in their play (meaning: on the tile).

- Biped gains points for each second it takes cat to retrieve the ball from dining room.

- Cat wins game when biped plays long enough to bore cat. Prize: something else shiny to occupy its attention, or possibly a good self crotch cleaning.

- Biped wins game when ball is accidentally kicked into cat's water bowl, thusly splashing cat. Reward: dirty, offended look from cat.


These are the rules always observed while I'm cooking in the kitchen. It is now written law.


( 8 comments — Leave a comment )
Apr. 22nd, 2007 09:17 pm (UTC)
All your points are belong to cats.
Apr. 23rd, 2007 12:29 am (UTC)
Indeed. I win at the end of the day, though, if for no other reason than I'm bigger than her.
Apr. 23rd, 2007 12:40 am (UTC)
Yes, but we are awake whilst you sleep, human :-D
Apr. 23rd, 2007 12:41 am (UTC)
Thank doodness for a door that shuts that anything without opposable thumbs cannot open!

Though she continuously claws at the door while I'm sleeping and mews.
Apr. 23rd, 2007 01:07 am (UTC)
Awe. Poor baby ...
Apr. 22nd, 2007 09:19 pm (UTC)
soooo soooo funny!
Apr. 23rd, 2007 12:29 am (UTC)
I accidentally left out .. something. I totally just forgot what it was, though.

And I know that there's SOMEthing going on with points involving when the cat knocks it under the fridge, but I haven't figured out what yet. I always have to be the one to fish it out, and if I DON'T, I get continuous dirty looks from Bacci until I do.
Apr. 23rd, 2007 02:18 pm (UTC)
The is so nice, about the only thing I have with Ms kitty is the "you may touch me now" repore. When I come home and open the door to the unit she runs out and lays stretched out on the rug in front of me. I can then bend down and rub her, if she leave her head pointed towards me then thats my target, if she leaves her back then thats where I go, Never the paws, stomach or hind quarters and at her sole discression if she wants to grab my fingers and gnaw on them she does.
( 8 comments — Leave a comment )


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Ticklebuddy Wonderpoo

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